it's so wonderful to have a baby in the house, but every time a baby won't stop crying, it used to worry me a lot. i used to get so scared i always felt like the baby could die with too much crying. thanks to the internet, now i don't get worried anymore. it's amazing how internet and google has increased my quality of life. here are the different advice from different experts:
Don't demand too much of yourself. If your newborn cries almost constantly, she won't do herself lasting harm. But it's likely to cause you and your partner a great deal of stress and worry. If she's unhappy and resists every effort to calm her down, you may feel rejected and frustrated. But you are not the cause of her crying, so don't blame yourself.
try not to sound rattled if a baby won't stop crying. to give calm, it is hard not to feel stressed when a baby is crying. but the best gift you can offer a baby is to keep your cool when she might not have hers. when a baby is crying frantically, it is natural for parents to speed up their movements or show they are rattled. this is not helpful. take a breath and just go through the following check list:
- try to check if she needs a change of diapers
- try to let her go to sleep
- check whether your baby is too hot or too cold by feeling her tummy. if her tummy feels too hot, remove a blanket, and if it feels cold, add one.
- make sure they don't have fever
- check if she is suffering from a gassy stomach. refer to the following articles:
- check if she needs some attention or someone/something to play with. experts estimate that meeting this need at least one third of the time is enough to support healthy bonding and secure attachment. although meeting this need 100% of the time is not bad either. it is a common misconception that this spoils the baby. this is one of those aspects where nature is very forgiving and flexible and you don't have to be perfect.
- offer a toy or pacifier (sucking can steady a baby's heart rate, relax her stomach, and calm flailing limbs)
- try to hold or hug her. you can also put her on a harness so she can feel close to you and you can multi-task.
- singing is one of the best soothing strategies because the familiar melodies can get the attention of the baby. talking to a baby in a calm, soothing voice lets her know that you are there and trying
to meet her needs. even if a baby does not calm down immediately, your tone of voice sends the message that you are concerned about her distress and are trying to help.
If you've met your baby's immediate needs and tried everything you can to calm her, but nothing's worked, it's time to take care of yourself. Put your baby in her cot and let her cry for a short spell out of your range of hearing. Take deep breaths. Put on some quiet music and let yourself relax for a moment or two.
Remind yourself that nothing is wrong with your baby and that crying won't hurt her. Sometimes simply accepting that you have a baby who cries a lot can help. You then won't wear yourself out looking for reasons for the crying, blaming yourself for it, or trying out endless potential remedies.
This crying is a phase and it will pass.
Every baby is different (but they all cry). You already know that no two babies are alike, but this reality may still hit you hard when you hear other parents talking about how easy their babies are or how their newborn sleeps peacefully through the night. Try to avoid comparisons and specific expectations, as they can create negative feelings.
You can also let a baby cry for a little while to see if she can soothe herself. When babies learn how to soothe themselves around crying, it helps them be able to settle better for sleep, attention and learning. While it is very important for babies to learn how to soothe themselves, it is not always easy, especially for fussy babies. One way to help a baby learn to self-soothe is to watch and wait for a few minutes when she begins to fuss or cry. Some ways that babies soothe
themselves are:
• Sucking on fingers or hand
• Bringing hands together
• Stopping crying briefly to look at something
• Touching something (hair, blanket, lovey)
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sources:
http://www.babycenter.com/0_what-to-do-when-your-baby-cries-for-no-reason_10320516.bc
(for more of my knowledge bombs, click the "ian's knowledge bombs" banner at the top of this article and choose any article in the table of contents that piques your interest)
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