Monday, October 7, 2019

don't be a prisoner of structure





managing family properties should be fun. enjoy the journey and don't worry about the destination. the biggest mistake i notice with most people is they feel it's a source of stress. that's ridiculous. the things we need to do with the properties is a thousand times simpler and less stressful than the activities we did all those years in school from elementary school to college. imagine for 15 years we had to force ourselves to wake up early every morning even if we did not have enough sleep because we had to finish a project or study for the exam, then listen to lectures all day, solve algebra problems, etc ...

it really baffles me that when it comes to managing family properties, which is far more important in terms of impact on our life, we tend to evade or neglect them such as tracking the status of the properties, identifying and resolving the issues, making sure the property taxes or HOA fees are paid on time by scheduling them in our calendar, researching all the pros and cons for each decision, having a cordial and rational (non emotional) discussion with other members of the family, etc ...

i think it's just psychological and most of us are programmed to function within a structure. our brains are wired such that we are only motivated to do something if it comes from a boss or a professor or if it's a NORM in society. outside the confines of this bubble, we tend to get intimidated and emotional and stressed out even if it's really a much simpler task or simple decision compared to the thousands of tasks and problems we needed to do in school.

humans are also programmed to function within a hierarchy. we are very good at following orders from our boss and giving orders to those who work for us or report to us. yet we tend to become dysfunctional when we have to work with our equals. that's why in the 2 world wars the proletariat killed each other instead of uniting against the ruling class. even the communist leaders can't get their acts together that's why it went all the way up to the fifth international because they keep breaking apart. that's why it's stupid to expect the workers can cooperate with each other to control the means of production.

we tend to categorize each person as either someone you should listen to or someone who should listen to you. but the truth is that we all have different strengths and weaknesses and even einstein can learn a lot from a vegetable vendor. we also become emotional and lose our ability to be rational and goal oriented. fortunately, unlike other animals, we have the ability to go against our instincts when the instinct is counterproductive in a certain situation. we just need to be aware of it so life becomes easier and fun.

the trick is to make a concrete plan, break up all the tasks into specific tasks, schedule the tasks, and have fun accomplishing the tasks. most likely it will only occupy 1% of your life yet most of us allow it to dominate or take over our life. most of the time i am in "waiting mode". my trick is to schedule it in my calendar. i use icloud calendar so in case i need to replace my iphone i don't have to re-enter everything in my calendar. then i forget about the task and just focus on living life to the fullest. cherish each day and moment of this very short and precious life. 

example the next item in my todo list is to go to quimonda hall of justice when the lockdown is lifted to get the certified deed of sale on the right of way of one of the properties. when this day comes i would treat it as a fun activity. i would arrange my music playlist for the enjoyable motorcycle ride and load the movies and audiobooks on my iphone in case there will be long queues or waiting times. if dining is already allowed i would stop by lola conching and feast on my favorite grilled seafoods and have my mind blown by the broth of clam shell tinola. our tendency is to treat the task as the main event and the clam shell tinola as the sideshow. why not turn it around and treat the clam shell tinola as the main even and going to quimonda hall of justice as the side show.

(for more of my knowledge bombs, click the "ian's knowledge bombs" banner at the top of this article and choose any article in the table of contents that piques your interest)

No comments:

Post a Comment