advice to my brother running for city councilor

table of contents:

 

I. how to win in politics 100% of the time

II. agenda guessing game

III. listen to a cockroach

IV. the agenda buffet

   A. missing ferrari wheel

   B. MaFHA - make filipinos healthy again

   C. gig economy and part time jobs

   D. internet speed

   E. road safety

   F. ebikes and escooters

   G. family farm wiki

   H. pandemic wiki

   I. calamity preparedness

   J. national unity

   K. olympic gold medal

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I. how to win in politics 100% of the time

dear brother, i decided to write this letter because when i saw in your poster indicating you are an environmentalist, i worry the people in the slums might try to kill you. smoke belching vehicles give me asthma so obviously i'm on your side. but i also know jeepney drivers and armored vehicle operators are worried stricter environmental laws will make it illegal or too expensive for them to operate and their children will starve. i'm just kidding about your life being in danger. but it's true that environmental issues is the last thing in the filipino voter's minds right now.

the only truly happy people are those who's goal in life is to help others. this has been scientifically proven by studies from harvard and stanford that spanned multiple decades. unfortunately, helping others is really more of who you are, not what you do. meaning if it's not your personality to enjoy helping others, you won't be happy even if you help others. this is not to put down those who don't have the helpful personality. all personality types have important roles to play in society. even those who spend all their hard earned income shopping for the latest brand name fashion are heroes of the economy because consumer spending is a big driver of the economy.

for me, there are 4 types of politicians. 

type 1 gets into politics for money and status. harvard and stanford studies prove that type 1 has a pathetic quality of life, even if they win.

type 2 gets into politics to help others. type 2 is always a winner, even if they don't get elected. type 2 always has a personal advocacy. they see a problem in society that they want to solve. they want to improve society or lessen people's sufferings. the advantage of type 2 is that politics is not the only channel to pursue their advocacy. there are many other channels to pursue their advocacy outside of politics.

type 3 share the same personality and goals as type 2 but has no desire for politics. for them politics is a burden and sacrifice. they get into politics because a friend asked them to fill a slot in the candidacy line up. i think you are a type 3 politician. 

when i saw the faces of the poor trisikad drivers in taboan, whose only means of feeding their family were being confiscated and hoisted into a truck filled with dozens of other trisikads, it broke my heart and that's when i knew that governing society gotta be the worst job in the world unless you have a heart of stone.

type 4 is like type 3 except their advocacy or agenda became so successful and popular they are sure they will get elected so they might as well run for office because it puts them in a better position to further their advocacy. type 4 is more of an accidental politician. 

type O+ is my blood type.

my point is the stress free and happy way to pursue politics is to pursue an advocacy/agenda and not worry about politics. 

II. agenda guessing game

politics is a likeability contest. aside from charisma, voice projection and name/family name recognition, a candidate's platform/agenda/advocacy is also big factor. the agenda that's most dear to the voter's hearts is too complicated to gauge and read. it's like the stock market. nobody can guess the direction of a stock or the market. human nature is a big factor and human nature can never be scientifically studied. morality and prosperity are just small factors. the smartest and most caring people even smoke cigarettes even if they know it causes cancer. the life of a settled farmer is easier and more secure compared to that of a nomadic herder yet the turks managed to seize anatolia (what is now turkey) from the powerful eastern roman empire because surprisingly the tough life of nomadic herders was more appealing to the local population. 

don't just depend on the morality and economic card. sometimes focusing on morality and corruption could backfire because it's like telling a smoker that smoking causes cancer. keep in mind there are so many smart, moral, and caring people who are smokers. i saw a billboard of leni robredo highlighting she will solve the corruption problem and she will restore decency in the presidency. i'm just a cockroach who hangs out in the slums a lot and based on my humble observation or read on the hearts of the masses, they will probably just be insulted if you say you will solve corruption because they know there are thousands of government employees and officials so it's not enough that you try to fight corruption. you also need competence and maneuvering skills or street smarts. also just imagine a vendor whose stall just got demolished. if they see the billboard they will just get angry because how in the world could decency feed her hungry children? decency does not put food on the table but a greedy foreign and immigration policy might and that's why tramph became president. he is so disgusting to the point that this facebook post could be automatically taken down if i spell his name correctly. yet support for him continues to increase in the #1 immigration dream destination in the world.

the masses are aware of the negatives of duterte. but at least they can now visit their friends and relatives in other slums without fear of being mistaken or suspected as a police asset by the drug lords who used to tyrannize the slums. before duterte, people feared the drug lords. now because of duterte, the drug lords have to lie low and make sure not to harm innocent people.

i'm not saying duterte is a good president. i'm just saying he simply won the agenda guessing lottery. but even if duterte did not win the election, he was still a winner because his agenda was his focus and his rise to national politics was really just accidental or being at the right place at the right time. 

III. listen to a cockroach

unlike lotto, the agenda guessing game is not a pure guessing game. you can get clues by listening to a cockroach like me. although i don't expect any normal person would ever listen to a cockroach. 

why listen to a cockroach? why not consult political experts? because the agenda guessing game boils down to the question of human nature. you cannot study and document human nature. you can only live and experience it. that's why even if the decision makers of maost china were experts and scientists with multiple phds, their decisions lead to 76 million people dying from starvation. productivity started to recover only when they dispersed the decision making to the uneducated farmers. 

this is why gifted people with likeable personalities and highly respected status such as celebrities and professors tend to be leftists or in the progressive side of the political spectrum because they tend to live in a bubble surrounded by the most humane individuals of society. moreover, people tend to be in their best behavior around them for fear of disappointing them. so they get this false sense of perception that we don't need harsh policies for the system to work.

everyone with common sense believes that egalitarian policies such as socialism or social democracy will only work if there is less corruption or everyone acts according to principle. the difference is that people with charisma and belonging to high status gets skewed sense of human nature. as the saying goes, "a liberal or leftist is someone who has not been mugged". my roommate in college is now a professor but he is not a leftist simply because when we were in college he was chased by some rival fraternity attempting to beat him up.

einstein needs to consult an uneducated vegetable vendor if it's safe to go in the slums to use the bathroom. the vegetable vendor should make the decision for einstein or else einstein could get mugged and even die. 

even if social scientists lives in the slums, they still won't have a clue on human nature because people would be in their best behavior around them. people will never dispose their used motorcycle oil in the river for fear of disappointing the venerable and honorable academic royalty. likeable people will never have any clue of true human nature. but nobody is ashamed to be naked in front of a cockroach so people don't even think twice before bashing the head of their daughter with a frying pan in front of me.

if you live in the slums, most likely you are not educated enough to document and write about human nature. if you are academically gifted person who grew up in the slums, most likely you will move to a nice townhouse or condo by the time you are mature enough to care about and observe human nature. if you really have good knowledge of human nature and are educated enough to write about it, most likely you will be smart enough to stay away from politics because your opinions will surely clash with your naive friends living in a bubble who think things will improve if we elect the right leader. leaders are just a reflection of the people. no matter how good the system or leader, things won't change if people don't act according to principle.

that's why american cities governed by mean and evil republicans tend to have higher standard of living and happiness while there are too many cities governed by caring and generous democrats that are crumbling and the people are suffering. and that's why duterte miraculously maintained 70% approval rating because the masses living in the slums understand that murderous policies could be our only hope to prevent the philippines from crumbling (like mexico where the drug cartels are more powerful than their military).

i strongly believed that pnoy was a very decent and honest president. but the criminals were not afraid of him and were able to do what they want. when i was at the departure gate in manila airport on my way to los angeles, an old woman was crying because she lost her passport. i asked her when she last saw her passport and she said just a few minutes ago while lining up to enter the gate. she was able to get on the flight after paying money to airport officials for "finding her passport". this racket is similar to "tanim bala" where they plant a bullet on your luggage. these rackets stopped when duterte was in charge because duterte vowed the fishes in manila bay will become fat from the dead bodies of the criminals. this is the reason why i never look down on anyone for supporting duterte or any tyrannical president.

cockroaches are rare individuals who can only get laid in exchange for economic favors so they hang out in the slums even if they are educated and have the means to hang out in a nicer and safer environment. so cockroaches accidentally have a better read on human nature. we have the best clues in the agenda guessing game.

of course human nature also has a proclivity for morality such as caring for the environment. but it's really just a means to an end. and that end is freedom and prosperity. i'm sure people who complain about immoral leaders also eat innocent cows and chickens even if we already have plant based alternatives which are even better for our health and the environment. their argument is that cows and chickens have less value. what determines value? intelligence? that means humans with less intelligence have lower value? a better argument is that we did a favor to the billions of cows and chickens we slaughtered throughout history because if we don't eat them we wouldn't breed them and they wouldn't have existed and enjoyed the greatest pleasure any living creature could ever enjoy which is to eat when hungry.

my point is that when it comes to human nature, there really is no such thing as right or wrong. it's like arguing which color is more beautiful. morality is simply what the most powerful and competent group dictates.

nowadays, there's so much wealth of new scientific discoveries and information in the internet available to everyone. the more technical or scientific information someone has, the higher the ability to solve problems of society. if you are electable, that means you are likeable, which means you spend most of your time socializing and you have less time watching ted talk or reading interesting articles just for fun. cockroaches are losers who spends too much time watching youtube and ted talk so we gain a lot of knowledge on possible solutions. 

man does not live by bread alone. a gay construction worker would be very unhappy if he marries marian rivera even if there really is no concrete difference between marian rivera and coco martin. they are both made of flesh and skin. they both take a bath and brush their teeth. this is why we can't just govern society based on ideals and principles that are too general to be useful. it has to be a case by case basis. it's always complicated. it always involves COMPROMISE. if you call supporters of any political candidate an idiot, you are the idiot. 

nobody outside of silicon valley would want to listen to a cockroach. it's just normal human nature. only miracles happen in places like silicon valley and norway where ideas are more important than charisma or social status. that's why they can make products that change the world such as facebook, google and the iphone. listening to a cockroach is as painful as a gay construction worker having sex with marian rivera. it's just human nature to refuse a life saving medicine from someone they don't like.

that's why as you know some in our family are suffering because i'm using my creativity and perseverance to resolve the issues of the family properties. i am literally putting millions in their bank accounts but then again, they are like gay construction workers forced to have sex with marian rivera. 6 months after grandma's death, i figured mourning period is over so i went to our aunts and uncles to tell them it's time to settle the estate taxes or else we incur 25% penalty. they were having dinner and walked away saying they lost their appetite because of me. if i had the charisma of a televangelist like quiboloy, they would have been very willing and happy to hear what i had to say. if i told them we should jump off the bridge they would have been very excited and happy to jump off the bridge.

IV. the agenda buffet

my best guess is that these are the agendas that could give any political candidate an advantage. the political candidate doesn't need to choose from this menu. just include all of these advocacies in his/her platform.

the trick here is for the politician to never show that he/she is despearate to be elected. the advocacy or agenda is more important to him/her and that being elected is just one of the channels to promote the agenda. showing that you don't care that much about politics is very appealing that's why tramph won because he was saying so many nasty things that politicians are never suppose to say as if he was not interested in politics which earned the trust of many independent voters.

the politician should say things like, "YOU DON'T NEED TO VOTE FOR ME. JUST SUPPORT THIS AGENDA OR URGE THE OTHER CANDIDATES TO SUPPORT THIS AGENDA  ...".

the best way to promote your agenda is start a youtube channel.

A. missing ferrari wheel

i think if manny pacquiao reads this letterer and follows my advice, it would increase his chance of becoming president. pacquiao is like a ferrari with 1 wheel missing and the leading candidates are like toyota corollas. i think any of the leading candidates will be a good president. just like a toyota corolla is a good car. a ferrari can easily overtake a toyota corolla, it's just that pacquiao's ferrari has 1 wheel missing.

 

any candidate can carry the agendas in this article. the reason why i chose pacquiao as an example is because he is the least educated which means he is more prone to thinking outside the box. educated people are more likely to be big headed and will even be insulted if you propose ideas to them.  the faculty of harvard are obviously one of the smartest and higly educated people in the world yet they almost kicked out zuckerberg for creating facebook.

nobody questions pacquiao's honesty and dedication, that's what makes him a ferrari. what worries people is that a government is composed of thousands of potentially corrupt officials and employees so the president also needs competence and maneuvering skills to solve the corruption problem. but we now have the technology that makes it easy to solve the corruption problem. we just need a simple and cheap database app that all citizens can query, access via a website, or download in their smartphone. the app will provide budget-expense transparency to all citizens. there can still be corruption in the area of revenue or tax collection. but the advantage of the app is that all the money that goes to the government can easily be accounted for.

the president doesn't need to figure out how to manage and maneuver the thousands of potentially corrupt officials and employees of his/her government. the president or candidate just needs THE FAITH AND WILL TO EDUCATE THE PEOPLE ABOUT THE POTENTIAL FOR THIS BUDGET-EXPENSE TRANSPARENCY APP. the idea for the budget transparency app will be pacquiao's missing wheel of his ferrari.

any citizen can audit any subtree in the budget hierarchy by writing a script that queries the database (maybe through AWS) and generate reports. any suspicious anomalies can quickly be detected and investigated. the website would be like porn to the citizens. especially in this pandemic where people want to know how much we are spending on testing and the quality of our supplier. it sounds crazy but duterte sacrificing the safety of his family by going to war with the drug lords when he was just a nobody is even crazier.

meaningful change requires sacrifice. 750 thousand americans died for slavery to end. the good news is nobody will die if we try this budget-expense transparency app. it's also not that expensive. SMALL DOWNSWING, HUGE UPSIDE POTENTIAL. besides, what other solution do we have? it's the reason why people buy lotto even if the chance of winning is very small. i admit THIS IDEA HAS SMALL CHANCE OF SUCCESS. but it's not that expensive to give it a try. 70% of filipinos even thought it was worth the try killing 5 thousand drug lords just to see if it solves the drug epidemic. i'm sure they will buy in to this very cheap idea where nobody dies.

the question is, do filipinos really care about the corruption? it's true that it's the favorite topic of conversation nowadays. but maybe it could just be virtue signaling. talking about corruption makes you feel you are better than everybody else. it's possible that filipinos don't really want to solve the corruption problem and just wants to enjoy the pleasures of virtue signaling and feelings of superiority. the drug problem was a blockbuster agenda because imagine the person you love the most, your very own child is not allowed to enter your house because he will steal your flat screen TV to buy drugs. your favorite pastime would be thinking of creative ways to kill the drug pushers and dealers who got your kid into drugs.

the big risk is that if this government transparency app becomes successful, it might be adopted by other countries and filipinos will become famous for this ingenuity. that would really suck because filipinos are suppose to be just maids and caregivers of the world. besides filipinos already have something to be proud of which is we invented the armalite rifle. we also have pacquiao even if in reality the lowest ranked heavyweight boxer can easily knock out pacquiao.

B. MaFHA - make filipinos healthy again

another thing i notice in the slums is that even before the pandemic, so many of my 50+ year old friends died of cancer and diabetes related illness. it's almost like the new normal. i hung out in the slums ever since i was a kid and 30 years ago, a person dying under 60 years old was very rare. 

i saw in ted talk that it's only recently that scientists confirmed that processed sugar is even more destructive than cigarettes. a big factor in a person's health, happiness, and energy to work enthusiastically is the serotonin produced by our gut bacteria and process sugar kills these precious gut bacteria. the destruction causes a domino effect. it causes depression, low energy and even makes person more susceptible to drug abuse. the person will suffer at work because of the lack of energy and enthusiasm. 

this agenda might even be more effective in solving the drug epidemic. a healthy microbiome means more serotonin for happiness and energy which means higher enthusiasm to work which means more self esteem which means less drug abuse which means less crime and so on and so forth. the political candidate should find a way to tie this agenda to the drug epidemic, which is already proven to be what's in the hearts of the voting majority.

all my life i was always sick and depressed, despite being a health buff and doing everything a person needs to do to be healthy. i only ate very healthy foods and i exercised a lot. yet i was still getting soar throat, sinusitis and flu at least once a month. when i learned about gut bacteria in ted talk and the destructive effects of processed sugar, i tried experimenting. i haven't had processed sugar in the past 5 months and for the first time in my life i haven't gotten sick. i always feel healthy, energetic, and happy. 

antibiotics from the pork and chicken we eat also destroys the gut bacteria. luckily, we can restore our gut bacteria by eating probiotics such as fermented cabbage (sauerkraut or kimchi). a political candidate who wishes to can just copy paste the photos in my advocacy page to their facebook page - https://www.facebook.com/Make-Filipinos-Healthy-Again-100153805226792. the political candidate can make cool speeches like,

"i have a dream. i dream that one day a fermenting jar of cabbage will be in every filipino household ...". 

freedom is more important to the masses more than life itself. therefore it's very important the politician should stress that this is purely an information or awareness campaign and that there should be zero regulations with regards to processed sugar. softdrinks won't be banned from schools and taxes won't be raised on junk foods. people will always be given the free will to decide what is good for them.

the complete info on "making filipinos health again" is in the following article: https://ian-crystal.blogspot.com/2020/10/make-filipinos-healthy-again.html

C. gig economy and the part time jobs

another problem i notice is there are too many filipinos who have the energy, health and competence to participate in the economy but they cannot participate in the economy because they suffer from a variety of biological disorders such as hypocretin deficiency which makes their biorhythm or energy cycle unpredictable. these disorders make it difficult for them to follow a fixed working schedule. the inability to earn a living can result in a loss of self-esteem and even drug abuse.

fortunately, we now have the technology and resources such as the internet to convert many of the jobs into gig jobs. a gig worker is an independent on-demand worker that has the freedom to work whenever they want to without any negative repercussion on their work reputation. if they feel sleepy, they can just turn off the app and go to sleep. currently, the gig economy is mostly limited to ride sharing systems (e.g. Grab, Angkas). offering more gig work opportunities will help the economy and promote a more prosperous and stable society.

i think any politician who launches an information campaign promoting the gig economy will steal the hearts of the filipinos. the politician can use my projects as examples.

i'm creating a lechon sharing app that promotes the gig economy - https://ian-crystal.blogspot.com/2021/06/asal-lechon-sharing-app.html 

helen of troy had a face that launched a thousand ships. this video will be the video that rescued a thousand troubled youths - cleaning gig training video. 

i also think supporting some kind of part time job opportunity law would win the hearts of many voters. here's the article i wrote about it - https://ian-crystal.blogspot.com/2020/03/part-time-opportunity-law.html.

D. internet speed

i think internet speed is a potential blockbuster agenda. the politician can push to bring in more telecom players to increase competition which improves quality of services and price.

E. road safety

motorcycles are the lifeblood of people living in the slums. i notice too many get injured or even die from motorcycle accidents. the politician can appeal to the "underdog" spirit of the voters by saying things like motorcyclists are always at the disadvantage because if it's your fault you die, and if it's the other motorist's fault you also die. then say the good news which is there is an easy solution. and that solution is strict enforcement of speed limits.

someone told me davao has strict enforcements of of speed limits. i laughed because if you strictly enforce a speed limit that means you value life. i would cut off my penis if anyone can show me proof that davao even has a speed limit. i googled it and there were many articles that show davao strictly enforces speed limits. oops. luckily i'm a cockroach i don't have a penis. people don't like speed limits. real leaders do what is good for the people even if people don't like it. that's why duterte never won another election in his life after he strictly enforced speed limits in davao.

F. ebikes and escooters

overwhelming scientific evidence shows that mankind is marching towards the cliff of mass extinction unless we don't do anything to combat climate change. ebikes and escooters do nothing but help humans from becoming extinct. it blows my mind everytime i see a cop harassing escooters and ebikes. 

then i see the supposedly highly intellectual activists of my alma matter protesting freedom of speech. talk about being out of touch of the times and reality.

mobility is the ticket to upward economic mobility of people in the slums. unfortunately, not everyone is competent enough to drive a motorcycle and not everyone is athletic enough to ride bicycles. legalizing escooters and ebikes and giving incentives such as no license and registration needed (just like bicycles) would really catapult any politician to be the next duterte.

G. family farm wiki

i find it ridiculous that it's possible to grow food on mars even if there is no air, no water, and the soil is very toxic yet when there is an economic crisis like the one in greece and venezuela, people go hungry. here's the full article that i wrote about this idea - https://ian-crystal.blogspot.com/2021/11/family-farm-wiki.html

H. pandemic wiki
 
i find it ridiculous that with all the technology we have, it's still hard to get critical information related to this pandemic. a politician can advocate for a centralized pandemic wiki style information website. here's the complete information about this agenda - https://ian-crystal.blogspot.com/2020/04/powerful-tool-against-covid-19.html

i also find it ridiculous that my friends complain my blog articles are too long. but then they don't complain that quarantine executive orders are not summarized or simplified for the common citizens. it's like you need to be a lawyer to understand an executive order. here is a sample of an executive order that i simplified. if you post these kinds of summaries on your social media platform, regular folks will relate to you more as a politician - https://ian-crystal.blogspot.com/2020/03/cebu-quarantine-orders.html.

 

I. calamity preparedness

here is a slick chess move. with climate change related disasters getting worse, a politician should add this calamity preparedness advocacy to his/her agenda. most likely the politician will be ignored or even ridiculed but when a very devastating calamity strucks, the politician can gain national prominence like duterte and say "I TOLD YOU SO" - https://ian-crystal.blogspot.com/2020/03/golf-on-rails.html
 

nowadays, people can sense manipulation and pretentiousness which explains why mar roxas didn't even win as senator and the ratings of CNN are in the toilet despite being the good guys.  meanwhile tramph became president despite saying shockingly racist statements and duterte's rating did not even dip when he said he fingered his maid. people get turned off if you are overly partisan. a very good philosophy a politician should follow in his/her social media talk shows is pragmatism. i wrote about his in my very long article - https://ian-crystal.blogspot.com/2019/06/politics-for-dummies.html

the politician can host dialogues and productive discourse inviting guests from opposite sides of the political spectrum where the objective is to pin point where we agree to disagree. the goal is to make everyone understand issues can sometimes be too complicated and not even the smartest person would know the best thing to do so we can only make our best guess. everyone should also understand that our best guess is influenced by our different in born personalities and experiences.

 

hosting these dialogues will give confidence to the voters that you have very good  mediating and conflict resolution skills which is very important when governing.

K. olympic gold medal

if a politician is into golf, a good political chess move is to shock the country by this crazy idea of promoting golf in the slums because it's the best way for our country to win another olympic gold medal. it's also very good for youth development and promotes health and exercise in the slums. golf can be very addictive even if it's just inside a small hitting cage and if this project catches fire and becomes a national phenomenon, the politician who is the face of this project will score lots of political points. the politician can also start a golf school based on my tutorial and use it as a vehicle for youth development and work ethic similar to mavs phenomenal basketball. the blueprint for these ideas are in chapter X of this blog article - https://ian-crystal.blogspot.com/2020/03/golf-on-rails.html

(for more of my knowledge bombs, click the "ian's knowledge bombs" banner at the top of this article and choose any article in the table of contents that piques your interest)